With each new step at Soulful Prairies I feel exhilaration and then there is always a little anxiety that tends to creep in. I used to think that when I reached that place of true understanding and confidence those feelings would disappear but in reality that is ridiculous! In reality a bit of anxiety drives us, shows us when we are standing right on the edge of change. If we never feel jittery or vulnerable we are not stretching. We are standing still.
As I stand at the edge of something new I feel a multitude of emotions and I continue to remind myself to absorb them and listen to the little hidden messages. In three weeks Soulful Prairies will open to the world of horse retirement. We are starting with just a few horses but I feel the enormity of the responsibility. I wonder about my time being drawn away from my family, snow, ice, shoveling and stuck doors, giving all the living things in my life the love and attention they need, slippery muddy paddocks, time for my homework….You have the idea – the wheels spinning out of control. I am asking those scenarios to step aside so I can glide into my new role with exhilaration. It is the newness of my life that is bringing the nerves.
It is time to step into this beautiful role that I have created for myself with dignity and grace and trust that the force pulling me knows more then I do. I am stretching and that is a magnificent thing!